There's no such thing as paranoia...

Someone once told me, “Don’t worry about what people say about you; anything you imagine is going to be a hundred times worse than anything they can come up with anyway.”

They were wrong.

Paranoia is not adequate- check out this mail sent to my girlfriend. What do you say to this sort of thing?

ROFL


From: Jennifer.TURNER@deewr.gov.au [mailto:Jennifer.TURNER@deewr.gov.au]
Sent: Monday, 21 July 2008 4:47 PM
To: XXXX
Cc: Benjamin.Zeven@defence.gov.au
Subject: Issues. [SEC=UNCLASSIFIED]

Dear Meredith,

Hiya, hope you had a good weekend. I've been thinking about a lot of things; you know, to do with our friendship. It's been a stressful process. You have become a really close friend and I value that. We have been there for each other and it's been great. All of these complications with you and Tom have been getting in the way of things, and I don't like it.

I really wish you could see things from our point of view, and was talking about this with Ben over the weekend.

So, what if things were a little different, and after that period when you were so down after Justin you didn't meet Tom but started taking heroin. I would have tried really hard to get you help, and try make you see how bad heroin is for you and how it can ruin your life. I would have even tried to understand you choosing to take heroin when you knew from the start it wasn't quite right.

But there would have come a time when I would realise that I couldn't help you. I would have to say, 'Meredith, I don't agree with your lifestyle choice; I don't want you to shoot up in front of me or at my house, because that is sending you a message that I accept what you're doing, and I do not. I have tried to support you through this, and even tried be supportive of your choice, even though I don't agree with it. It's because I care about you that I can't stand by and watch you make decisions that I feel strongly will negatively affect your life. I can see that you don't want my help or value my opinion when it comes to your use of heroin, so there's nowhere else our friendship can go until you are ready to give it up.' It would be very hard to say that, because in saying it I would risk you not wanting to be friends at all, and withdrawing completely into your world.

I would say it though, because I am an honest and true friend. I have always been honest with you, because I believe being silent where I think there is reason for concern is not something a good friend does.

That's how both Ben and I feel about you and Tom. It sounds harsh, I have deliberately used the heroin analogy because that's how toxic I feel your relationship with him is to you. And like heroin, it doesn't just affect you, but people close to you who love you, who get to see the impact.

You are always welcome at our place, and Ben and I still hope you think of both of us as true, honest friends who only have your happiness at heart. You may not agree with that, especially after reading this, but it's true. We think of you as a dear, dear friend who we love a lot. It's hard for us to watch you with Tom. That is why he is no longer welcome at our place. Per my sentiments above, we can no longer support your choice, because we feel it is so wrong for you.

I admire the fact that you try to see the best in everyone. Listening to your intuition is not being cynical; if you feel something's up then it probably is. Tom won't tolerate us because he knows we don't believe him. The crux of the matter is this; Ben and I accept you Meredith, but we don't accept your choice to be with Tom.

You are a wonderful, giving person. I hope my being honest about the way I feel won't spell the end of our friendship.

Jennifer Turner
Access, GTTP, TIP
DEEWR SA State Office
Phone (08)8306 8816 Fax (08)8306 8822



Classification: UNCLASSIFIED